Self Love Podcast

SLP 99: Don’t Be Afraid To Be You with Chris Jordan

Episode 99
10, Aug, 2021
}66 Minutes

Show Notes

“I think in a way it is, it’s not being afraid to bring out who you really want to be. And what you really need to share. Because we’re scared of judgement and a lot of times we are going to be judged by other people. And we take that extremely personally. It’s not exactly about us. It’s more about that other person because they’re projecting their own judgement onto you. But I think a lot of the time it’s fear of judgement. And it probably links back to what we were just talking about in that, that locks us up and it stops us from being or acting how we truly want to be.”

If life is challenging, know that it is not unusual. Everyone goes through challenges. Even if it is unravelling in front of you, the point of Chris Jordan’s work is to see if you can get curious about what is happening and what it is there to teach you. Chris says don’t be afraid to be you, dont be afraid that you wont come out the other side because you will. One of the big questions we investigate is ‘How can we understand true happiness when we don’t choose to understand true sadness?’ You are going to love this conversation with one of the world’s most precious and clever souls.

Whatever we go through without undermining the challenge or pain, it is indeed purely a perception of what you are going through.

Chris shares a story about how the work he does helped a client who was carrying a lot of guilt over a lot of years. There was an unconscious part of him that he did not feel he had any control over. He procrastinated and was not present with himself or others. This guilt was almost a sign of punishment, yet he was not aware of it at all.

One event made his life take a strange turn. An event that occurred many years ago kept snowballing and attracting more of the same. It was only through hypnotherapy and different processes this guilt was let go of which was hugely profound.

Chris loves to see how the unconscious mind is running and how we can shift things at an unconscious level, as this is where he believes the magic of change really occurs.

Chris also believes it is important to have awareness outside of your sphere. The power of a coach is where people get to take their life to a whole new level. And to understand this we just need to see a little more about this special man.
Chris Jordan grew up surrounded by a lot of chaos and uncertainty. It took him a long time to realise that the roller coaster lifestyle he had adopted wasn’t the only way to live. He himself had had enough of the pain.

At 27 he turned his life around and truly became alive.

He now works with individuals and couples to create a better understanding with themselves. Bringing awareness to their own unique process and what’s trying to unfold. Through extensive training in hypnosis and other psychotherapy and working with clients on many different levels he helps people to feel free, break through the illusion of being stuck and get out of their own way. Allowing them to do what they are truly here to do.

A father of five amazing children and a multiple business owner he has worked through his own process and education and realised very strongly that our external circumstances do not determine how you feel or who you are. It’s your relationship with self that allows you to get the most out of life. Everyone deserves to know and experience that inner knowing, that powerful feeling!

Chris talks in this interview about the sadness these days of going through challenge and not having enough wiser, older more understanding souls to turn to. He believes we have lost the elders and tribal way of living where we naturally had mentors to give us new perspective, love and understanding.

To grow, he believes it is great to introduce something new. And a Coach can bring new awareness that is outside the field, allowing you to stretch your thinking that maybe you hadn’t considered before.

We talk in-depth about the schooling system. Money, relationships, mindset, spirituality and our innermost self and what things are quite possibly missing.

But Chris believes our schools are there to educate us, to enable us to be academic to learn to read and write to get a certain perspective on the world, practical skills. He thinks the parents are so so important in being the coach for their children. He talks about 30 kids to one teacher. It’s not really a scenario where you can have those unique conversations. He believes it needs to happen more at home.

It’s not always clear what is right or wrong for each person. We grow through school and challenge so profoundly. You get an education and then it is up to you what to do with it.

Most of the time we discover it is not about outside influences or occurrences but more so the inner knowing, how we are unconsciously processing them and then consciously allowing our inner resources to be accessed. Letting go of negative emotions from the past like guilt, shame, fear, sadness, conflict, anger and hurt can all block the ability to heal and move forward.

We talked about Danny being a part of the Portraits of Mankind and how tough it is for men to speak up and not have to tough it out. This highlights the importance of vulnerability and how to get out of our own way. https://www.thealliance.org.au/get-invloved/portraits-of-mankind/

Chris believes it is about not being afraid to be you. If you are bottling things up, suffering, (or even not suffering if suppressing your happiness when others are) it’s important to be yourself. When we suppress whether good or bad, shit starts to get real.

He mentions the movie ‘In Pursuit Of Happiness’ and recommends we do not marginalise or judge ourselves for whatever point we are at. It is part of the process and not just a destination. Life is powerful because of ALL parts of life.

How can we understand true happiness when we don’t understand true sadness? Gratitude is one of the most powerful emotions we can have. If you have had one setback after another and it feels uncomfortable, the greater the struggle the greater your happiness and positive emotion is on the other side.

Chris shares his thoughts around mental health and suicide especially for men. The Aussie culture of just suck it up and the tall poppy syndrome is compounded with the fact men do not talk as much or are as social. A lot of men do not talk about their innermost feelings as much as they could, or maybe, should. We talk about how to guide the people you love when you want to reach out and help if they are struggling.

Chris’s definition of Self Love is: Acceptance. It’s about accepting who you are. Accepting what’s happened to you and your processes. Not marginalising it or judging yourself but saying hey, this is it, this is who I am, this is who I am in this moment at least. We are always evolving and accepting where you are at, what you have done or haven’t done. Knowing that we are all flawed in some areas and you may never fully have it all together. Allow yourself ot be present in moments. There is more in it for you than you think. Life isn’t about getting it all right, it’s an experience. It’s all about acceptance.

We talk about Chris’s role as a father of 5 kids and what it means to him to be a dad. How he has navigated the split with his first partner and mother of 3 children. He said it may not be the scenario you’d want but its amazing. He loves what he learns from his kids.

The roles that we parent’s play is so hugely important. He is a very involved father.

His advice to his kids would be to live your life! To know yourself, understand yourself but don’t take it too seriously either.
Don’t take life too seriously. There are some serious parts of it. But we take it a little bit too personally and a little too serious. Don’t be afraid to laugh at yourself when you completely screw it up! Don’t get taken out by making a mistake. Find what you can take from that thing. See what’s unfolding for you.

Favourite quote is: Eckhardt Tole

‘Life isn’t as serious as the mind makes it out to be.’

Best link to follow Chris is on Instagram: @evision_coaching

Please note this podcast mentions suicide.

If you are struggling in any way please note the following places to reach out for support and help.

Lifeline – https://www.lifeline.org.au/  Ph:131114
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MUSIC INTRO & OUTRO

Many thanks to Wes and Charlotte Carr – https://wesleydeanmusic.com/

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Welcome to the self-love podcast a show that cracks open your heart and inspires a deeper regard for your own wellbeing and happiness. Expert interviews, ‘how-to’ quickies and deep dive conversations into the heart of our souls, unravelling the mystery, struggles and joys of simply being human.

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