Self Love Podcast
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SLP 115: Time Is Of The Essence with Deb Battaglini
05, Oct, 2021
‘The older you get they tell you; you have less time. There’s less hours in the day and minutes in the hour. And it’s interesting since I have heard that, I feel that. I feel like time is of the essence and that if we are given this one opportunity to be on earth, and I have seen how short life can be, and how we should 100% embrace every opportunity and why not experience everything that is available to us. And as you have previously mentioned, being open to it. And being available to it as well. I truly believe that anything is possible.’
Deb Battaglini former bank owner, event manager and charity fundraiser shares her beautiful life story, the highs and lows and how the big challenges you go through can make you stronger. It is important to know that what you are going through that you will be ok and you will get out the other side. She knows that life is never an easy course. It’s going to have lots of different twists and turns, but it is very much how we respond to those situations that determines us. Deb appreciates we can’t always get it right, and has had to let go of perfection over the years, especially with three kids. She believes you just have to be present in that space, in that decision and at that time.
Life has come full circle for this special soul I have known for over 15years. Born and raised in Canberra Debbie Battaglini moved a lot as a young woman. She has lived in Melbourne and NZ and now calls Queensland her home.
Debbie was married to a renowned banker Laurie Clarke, for 15 years and describes him as someone, who when he spoke, you would stop and listen. Everything he said was well thought through, he was respectful, loved, gracious, intelligent, gentle and genuine. Sadly, a number of years ago dear Laurie became terminally ill and Debs whole world was shattered, leaving her with their three young children.
She remembers wondering how life could move on and thanks to an oncology nurse who pulled her aside as Laurie was near the end of his life, she gave her a piece of advice that Deb says she will never forget. Wanting to escape to Italy for 12 months the Nurse told her, that her children need stability and consistency and suggested she stay put for a bit. Debs listened and to this day is grateful for her advice.
Deb describes herself as a perfectionist and how much life has challenged her to be adaptable and willing to ride the waves.
When asked, ‘Who are you?’, Deb said a valuable lesson she took from her nomination as the Sunshine Coast Business Awards was wondering who you are when you stopped what you do? Deb says you are not the label but what you represent. First and foremost, she is a mum and even though she has always put everyone else first she has since learned the importance of taking care of herself.
Self-preservation is paramount. Having the ability to cope through things like witching hour. Put time aside for yourself no matter what.
To be a great parent she believes open communication and conversations with nothing off-limits is the best advice. Being there 24-7. She tells her kids your integrity means everything, so it is important to not be a liar. The kids might cross the line, but they know who they are and what they want to stand for. Kids jobs are to push the boundaries and our job is to pull them back into line. Equip yourself with as much information as you can and a great community.
Deb talks about her own mother and how much of an incredible woman she was. Even though she struggled with mental health issues she always seemed to be a tower of strength. Her takeaway from her mother would be that we come in on our own we leave on our own, but to show that inner strength through all things.
Deb speaks openly about the loss of her mum. When living in NZ, she got the call that her mother had taken her own life and Debs recalls how devastating it was, how tragic it was. She thanks the Universe for the work she was doing at the time around youth suicide to equip her to get through this incredibly devastating and challenging time and appreciate that perhaps there was no accident there.
She shares how to keep showing up through all challenges and that for her, family and friends are paramount through the times of struggle, and community is everything. The most important thing she can suggest on a daily basis when going through a challenging time is to get out of the house, get in the sunshine. Get that space for yourself. If you have to, get the kids out there with you, take them along, no matter what it is important to get out in the fresh air. And get someone you can trust, maybe with a medical background to regularly check in with on a fortnightly basis.
What you put out to the Universe you get back. Deb says she does not believe in bad karma she believes in the good. She believes people come into your life for a reason or season and they can serve in whatever way you need at that time. Deb also believes her beautiful new fiancé Col was hand-picked by Laurie. Col is an extraordinary man, he is calm and has a beautiful energy. And she is ever so grateful every day for this beautiful opportunity to marry again.
The Universe knows what you need and at what time and will over and over give you what you can handle. Our destiny is ahead of us, it is already mapped out she believes, and yes maybe sometimes it is the sliding doors moments and what choices you make so trust that.
Deb is blown away by how this beautiful man Col has come into her life. She believes there is always someone out there who will be your soul mate no matter what. She appreciates it is not always easy but says sometimes take your foot off the pedal and smell the roses. Sit back and enjoy life for a change. It will all be ok. It is ok every now and again it will unfold, and all is meant to be.
She talks about how tough covid has impacted on family and that travel has been pulled out from under us all. She says she has learned to create a closer connection to family. Navigating covid is a real chance to stop as it has forced us to look at things differently. It all depends on how you want to respond to things. Look at the positives and focus on ourselves. Notice what we can contribute to the life. Try and find the good in bad situations. All things shall pass.
Debs is so grateful for her networks as it is connectedness that has got them all through. When you have love in your heart and surrounding you… love is all that matters.
Her final piece of advice is to know you are enough. No matter what your current form or situation you are an amazing, beautiful human being. And regardless of what you are going through to know it will all pass.
If you have self-doubt or not good enough know that tomorrow is a new day. Never make a decision in night-time in the darkness. Make it in broad daylight when you are fully functioning. And know that you are strong enough with the love and support of those you trust. You can reach out to someone like a GP. Journal and share your thoughts. Society as a whole, shows that the majority are all good people and great listeners. Just know that you are not alone and can get through anything.
The book Debs is speaking of is ‘How To Stop Worrying and Start Living’ by Dale Carnegie. She also recommends ‘The Body Keeps The Score’ by Bessel Van der Kolk.
So to recap Debbie Battaglini-Clarke is the former Owner/Manager & Marketing Director of the BOQ Maroochydore, a multi-award-winning full-service bank – with a heart. Her roles included marketing and event managing, strategic development, finance and HR – in effect all of the business functions other than the operational aspects of banking.
Deb has enjoyed a long and varied career in business development, marketing and as a business owner. These roles have included mass media, owner of Table Toppers (an event management business), and working as the Corporate Partnerships Manager of leading children’s charities. On a personal note, she says one of her greatest achievements to date is her three beautiful children, Adison, 14 years of age and after 5 IVF attempts, her high-spirited 10 year old twins James & Sofia – the joys of my life.
Deb’s definition of Self Love is having it all but maybe not having it all at the same time. It is being 100% present in that moment, in that space. Try not to multi-task, just stay focused in the now. Time is of the essence and make every moment count.
Her favourite quote is shared in her household daily:
You get what you get, and you don’t get upset!
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